User blog:BobbyIsAwesome/A Little Girl Named Clarissa vs Charlie Matheson Jr.
Hey! It's me, Bobby! Halloween may be over, but I made a parody of Scrooge vs Trump! A little girl named Clarissa fights against Slender Man victim Charlie Matheson Jr., but is he alone? Cast SkeepTiel as A Little Girl Named Clarissa ASZ Productions as Charlie Matheson Jr. Yobar as I.M. Meen Zander Peers as Harvey Beaks Justin Buckner as The Slender Man Kevin Krust as Announcer Introduction Announcer: EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY! A LITTLE GIRL NAMED CLARISSA VS CHARLIE MATHESON JR. BEGIN! The Battle A Little Girl Named Clarissa: Wake up, Charles! I’m about to take a dickens of a dump On this lonely, hopeless little miserable grump! I’m like the eyes of the Halloween pumpkin! You’re like the shit! I’m not known for my heart, but you’re still getting split! You remind me of my mother and of my father, ‘cause you disgust me! Keep your CM from Charlie Sr. away from me! Don’t even touch me! I don't shake hands! I don't make fans! I ruin rappers faster than childish brats! I creep into your room and kill you slowly, by cutting you and watching you bleed to death! My raps will haunt you, make you think you're going insane! You're about to get whooped by three emcees of the ethereal plane, So when the clock strikes, prepare to enter a world of Halloween pain, 'Cause I'm out! I got my own fucking problems, NO PAIN MEANS NO GAIN!! Charlie Matheson Jr.: How dare you disturb me with your frickin’ pinnacles? You scare me worse than the Slender Man, and he grabbed me with his tentacles! He’s a creepypasta, but about you? I DON’T CARE! I do not believe in spirits and I don’t believe the flare! I.M. Meen: Don’t panic, Charles, but you dissed a creepy girl! I’m I.M. Meen, the most powerful magician in the world And you’re just a little little little little smartie! By the end, I’ll make a really evil party! Slender Man? It can’t scare me! I.M. not afraid! You shouldn’t have made like Gnorris and kissed the maid Because your greed is the curse that’s gonna tear you apart! What’s good in your purse if you’re poor in your heart? Charlie Matheson Jr.: 0 out of 10! You scare me worse than Clarissa and Slendy! I hope you and Slendy won’t be so so trendy! Hope and survival; that’s the life I’ve selected, So enough with your pictures from the past! I'm not affected! Harvey Beaks: Hello, my name is Harvey Beaks! I’m the spirit of the current Halloween! Charlie Matheson Jr.: Nice to meet you, Harvey. Look at that! I mean, seriously, are you dressed as a cat? Harvey Beaks: No! I’m dressed as a mailman who went out in a full moon And was bitten by a werewolf! I roam the streets looking for fresh victims And also delivering small to mid-size packages. I look so nice and you should go to beans ‘Cause you don’t know the spirit of Halloween! If you don’t leave me, I’ll scare you like “BOO”! Do you wanna see me do this? *howls* Charlie Matheson Jr.: NO! THIS ISN’T HAPPENING! OH, THIS IS MADDENING AGONY! Wait. Actually, Harkening back to Clarissa’s lecture, I‘m expecting the final specter! The Slender Man: BOO! Charlie Matheson Jr.: AHHH! The Slender Man: YOU’RE GONNA DIE WITH NO ONE TO LOVE YOU AND NO ONE TO CRY! ALONE BY YOURSELF ON THE BED OF YOUR DEATH WITH THE STENCH OF REGRET ON YOUR LAST DYING BREATH ‘CAUSE YOU CHOSE THE PATH OF A SELFISH MAN WITH LAUREN’S INNOCENT BLOOD IN YOUR HANDS! THE PENANCE YOU PAY FOR THE WAY YOU BEHAVE IS WRITTEN AS PLAIN AS THE NAME ON THIS GRAVE! Charlie Matheson Jr.: Are these the shadows of things that will be? Or things that may be, only? If I depart from my course, can they change? Say it is thus with what you show me! I promise to mend my ways! A friend to all kids is what I will become! It's Halloween! I haven't missed my chance to be different! God bless us, every— Announcer: WHO WON? WHO’S NEXT! YOU DECIDE! EPIC! Uh oh! *screams as the logo runs away and Harvey runs on-screen* Harvey Beaks: (talking) *howls* HAPPY HALLOWEEN! *walks off-screen* Announcer: *the logo rushes on-screen again* RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY!! Poll Who Won? A Little Girl Named Clarissa Charlie Matheson Jr. I.M. Meen Harvey Beaks The Slender Man Everyone Nobody Category:Blog posts